You might know me from somewhere. I’m always nervous that I won’t have enough time to do my work. I just want to be left alone so I can get on with it. When people ask me to do things, even going for a walk in the park, I’m always saying, ‘I don’t have enough time…’ I have so much to do! So it’s great when, at last, I’ve got a clear day. The house is quiet. I’ve got eight hours. That should be plenty. But when there’s so much time, it seems silly not to read this article in the paper. It’s about a celebrity – he just got married. She’s pretty… I might just look up what film she was in online. … interesting… Wonder what they’re saying over on this website… …a volcano… in Indonesia… wow… Oh, Poor things… I’m peckish now. It’s hard to stop, when there’s nothing else to do that’s as nice. Some people say I should go out and take a break. Why not go for a walk? But you see I like to be near my work. If I’m too far, I get guilty. But if I’m too near, well… The perfect distance for doing nothing is when you have the constant chance to do something. It’s a bit frightening to be honest. Someone told me an average life only has 600,000 hours in it. So many people around me are getting on, doing stuff. But if you scare me too much with all this, I get sad. I lie down and think I’m so hopeless there’s no point getting up. I’m ashamed. I don’t like myself much. It seems like I’m lazy. That’s what everyone would say, I know. But in truth, I do nothing, not because I’m lazy, but because I’m scared. I’m terrified that if I start, what I do will be horrible. I want things to be so amazing – and I know they can’t be, so it seems best not even to begin. What helps me most is when occasionally, it feels like it doesn’t matter… When it feels I can mess up and that would be OK. When the pressure isn’t so great. Like when I was younger – and there was less at stake There’s a bit of me inside you. It’s best to try to understand me. And not scare me with perfection. Go gently… Once you’ve worked out how I work, you’ll get a lot more done.